Carl Hiaasen - Author

About the Author

Carl Hiaasen was born and raised in Florida, where he still lives. He is a prize-winning journalist with a regular column in the Miami Herald and many articles in varied magazines. He started writing crime fiction in the early 1980s and has recently branched out into children's books; he has also had several works of non-fiction published.

Author photo  © Fenia Hiaasen
 

Featured books by Carl Hiaasen

Bad Monkey

Bad Monkey

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Paperback Release Date: 12/06/2014

When a severed arm is discovered by a couple on honeymoon in the Florida Keys, former police detective - now reluctant restaurant inspector - Andrew Yancy senses that something doesn't add up. Determined to get his badge back, he undertakes an unofficial investigation of his own. Andrew's search for the truth takes him to the Bahamas, where a local man, with the help of a very bad monkey (who allegedly worked on the Pirates of the Caribbean movies) is doing everything in his power to prevent a developer from building a new tourist resort on the island, with deadly consequences ...

Bad Monkey

Bad Monkey

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Hardback Release Date: 12/06/2014

Shortlisted for the Goldsboro Last Laugh Award at CrimeFest 2014. When a severed arm is discovered by a couple on honeymoon in the Florida Keys, former police detective - now reluctant restaurant inspector - Andrew Yancy senses that something doesn't add up. Determined to get his badge back, he undertakes an unofficial investigation of his own. Andrew's search for the truth takes him to the Bahamas, where a local man, with the help of a very bad monkey (who allegedly worked on the Pirates of the Caribbean movies) is doing everything in his power to prevent a developer from building a new tourist resort on the island, with deadly consequences.

Star Island

Star Island

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Hardback Release Date: 02/02/2012

Twenty-two-year-old pop star Cherry Pye is attempting a comeback from her latest drug and alcohol disaster. Ann DeLusia is Cherry's 'undercover stunt double', standing in for Cherry whenever the singer is too wasted to go out in public. But, one night, Ann-as-Cherry is mistakenly kidnapped from a Miami hotel by an obsessed paparazzo named Bang Abbott. Now the challenge for Cherry's handlers (comprising the world's pushiest stage mother; perverted record producer; nipped-and-tucked twin publicists; weed-strimmer-wielding bodyguard) is to rescue Ann while keeping her existence secret from the public. Will Bang achieve his fantasy of a private photo session with Cherry? Will Cherry sober up in time to lip-synch her concert tour and promote her new album, Skantily Klad? And will Ann escape from Cherry's shadow?

Other books by Carl Hiaasen

Assume the Worst

Assume the Worst

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Hardback Release Date: 10/04/2018

This is the ultimate hilarious, cynical, but absolutely realistic view of a college graduate's future. And what he or she can or can't do about it. This commencement address will never be given, because graduation speakers are supposed to offer encouragement and inspiration. That's not what you need. You need a warning. So begins Carl Hiaasen's attempt to prepare young men and women for their future. And who better to warn them about their precarious paths forward than Carl Hiaasen? The answer, after reading Assume the Worst, is: nobody. Illustrated by bestselling author/illustrator and National Book Award winner Roz Chast, this book is bound to be a classic, sold year after year come graduation time. Although it's also a good gift for anyone starting a job, getting married, or recently released from prison. Because it is not just funny. It is, in its own Hiaasen way, extremely wise and even hopeful. Well, it might not be full of hope, but there are certainly enough slivers of the stuff in there to more than keep us all going.

Assume the Worst

Assume the Worst

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 10/04/2018

This is Oh, the Places You'll Never Go--the ultimate hilarious, cynical, but absolutely realistic view of a college graduate's future. And what he or she can or can't do about it."e;This commencement address will never be given, because graduation speakers are supposed to offer encouragement and inspiration. That's not what you need. You need a warning."e; So begins Carl Hiaasen's attempt to prepare young men and women for their future. And who better to warn them about their precarious paths forward than Carl Hiaasen? The answer, after reading Assume the Worst, is: Nobody. And who better to illustrate--and with those illustrations, expand upon and cement Hiaasen's cynical point of view--than Roz Chast, best-selling author/illustrator and National Book Award winner? The answer again is easy: Nobody. Following the format of Anna Quindlen's commencement address (Being Perfect) and George Saunders's commencement address (Congratulations, by the way), the collaboration of Hiaasen and Chast might look typical from the outside, but inside it is anything but. This book is bound to be a classic, sold year after year come graduation time. Although it's also a good gift for anyone starting a job, getting married, or recently released from prison. Because it is not just funny. It is, in its own Hiaasen way, extremely wise and even hopeful. Well, it might not be full of hope, but there are certainly enough slivers of the stuff in there to more than keep us all going.

Razor Girl

Razor Girl

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Paperback Release Date: 06/09/2016

Key West is a small place, but there are criminal secrets buried everywhere . . . When jumped-up reality TV star Buck Nance aggravates the crowd in a Key West bar, he incites a riot and vanishes in the melee. His hapless agent Lane Coolman should have been by Buck's side, but has been accidentally taken hostage by two petty criminals who now think they can turn a quick profit by ransoming an LA talent agent. As the search for Buck continues, the mystery draws in a broad cast of characters from across the island including Andrew Yancy, the disgraced cop who now works restaurants on roach patrol; a delusional fan of Buck's show; the local sheriff who's desperate for re-election; a shady lawyer and his gold-digging fiancee; the gay mayor and his restauranteur partner; a Mafioso hotelier; and a redheaded con artist named Merry who, using a razor blade and a high-speed car, has developed a signature way of luring in her victims. Outrageously funny, fast-paced and uniquely addictive, Razor Girl will keep you utterly gripped until the final page.

Razor Girl

Razor Girl

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 06/09/2016

The new full-tilt, unstoppably hilarious and entertaining novel from the best-selling author of Skinny Dip andBad MonkeyWhen Lane Coolman's car is bashed from behind on the road to the Florida Keys, what appears to be an ordinary accident is anything but (this is Hiaasen!). Behind the wheel of the other car is Merry Mansfield--the eponymous Razor Girl--and the crash scam is only the beginning of events that spiral crazily out of control while unleashing some of the wildest characters Hiaasen has ever set loose on the page. There's Trebeaux, the owner of Sedimental Journeys--a company that steals sand from one beach to restore erosion on another . . . Dominick "e;Big Noogie"e; Aeola, a NYC mafia capo with a taste for tropic-wear . . . Buck Nance, a Wisconsin accordionist who has rebranded himself as the star of a redneck reality show called Bayou Brethren . . . a street psycho known as Blister who's more Buck Nance than Buck could ever be . . . Brock Richardson, a Miami product-liability lawyer who's getting dangerously--and deformingly--hooked on the very E.D. product he's litigating against . . . and Andrew Yancy--formerly Detective Yancy, busted down to the Key West roach patrol after accosting his then-lover's husband with a Dust Buster. Yancy believes that if he can singlehandedly solve a high-profile murder, he'll get his detective badge back. That the Razor Girl may be the key to Yancy's future will be as surprising as anything else he encounters along the way--including the giant Gambian rats that are livening up his restaurant inspections.From the Hardcover edition.

Nature Girl

Nature Girl

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: CD-Audio Release Date: 04/12/2014

Star Island

Star Island

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: CD-Audio Release Date: 04/12/2014

Sick Puppy

Sick Puppy

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: CD-Audio Release Date: 04/12/2014

Skink--No Surrender

Skink--No Surrender

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 23/09/2014

Carl Hiaasen serves up his unique brand of swamp justice in the New York Times bestseller SkinkNo Surrender. A National Book Award Longlist Selection When your cousin goes missing under suspicious circumstances, who do you call? There's only one man for the job: a half-crazed, half-feral, one-eyed ex-governor named Skink. Skink joins 14-year-old Richard on a breakneck chase across Florida, undaunted by lightning storms, poisonous snakes, flying bullets, and giant gators. There are a million places cousin Malley could be, a million unpleasant fates that might have befallen her, but one thing is certain: in the Florida swamp, justice is best served wild.SUNSHINE STATE AWARD FINALIST!

Bad Monkey

Bad Monkey

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Paperback Release Date: 12/06/2014

When a severed arm is discovered by a couple on honeymoon in the Florida Keys, former police detective - now reluctant restaurant inspector - Andrew Yancy senses that something doesn't add up. Determined to get his badge back, he undertakes an unofficial investigation of his own. Andrew's search for the truth takes him to the Bahamas, where a local man, with the help of a very bad monkey (who allegedly worked on the Pirates of the Caribbean movies) is doing everything in his power to prevent a developer from building a new tourist resort on the island, with deadly consequences ...

Carl Hiaasen Collection: Hoot, Flush, Scat, Chomp

Carl Hiaasen Collection: Hoot, Flush, Scat, Chomp

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 28/05/2014

Discover the funny side of Florida with #1 New York Times bestselling author Carl Hiaasen in this collection of four books: Hoot, Flush, Scat and Chomp."e;It's classic Hiaasenlaugh-out-loud Satire in a Florida setting."e; Life

Edible Exile

Edible Exile

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 11/03/2014

Cuervo is a pampered Nicaraguan moneyman, funding a guerrilla war from his cushy Miami penthouse. Sixto is his hulking, pistol-packing attendant, whose job satisfaction is on the wane. When an aging mobster enters their lives with a promise to help the rebel causewith a planeload of chickens originally intended for voodoo sacrificea tense situation turns combustible. From the wickedly funny mind of Carl Hiaasen comes ';The Edible Exile,' a raucous story of sleazeball nihilists, lovable thugs, and jungle-weary freedom fighters who collide in a battle of wills, ego, and the almighty dollar. This cheeky tale, written twenty-five years ago, set aside, and recently rediscovered, is a time-capsule glimpse of Miami during the over-the-top 1980s, when everyone was on the make and gross excess was the order of the day. In an intriguing twist, Hiaasen had lost his original ending to the story. ';So I decided to write a new ending,' he says. ';As a friend said, ';How often does a writer get the opportunity to collaborate with a younger version of himself?'' The Edible Exile is a wild romp through Hiaasen Country, sure to appeal to the outlaw in all of us.

Dance of the Reptiles

Dance of the Reptiles

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 28/01/2014

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLERIf you think the wildest, wackiest stories that Carl Hiaasen can tell have all made it into his hilarious, bestselling novels, think again. Dance of the Reptiles collects the best of Hiaasen's Miami Herald columns, whichlay barethe stories--large and small--that demonstrate anew that truth is far stranger than fiction.Hiaasen offers his commentaryindignant, disbelieving, sometimes righteously angry, and frequently hilariouson burning issues like animal welfare, polluted rivers, and the broken criminal justice system as well as the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, Bernie Madoff's trial, and the shenanigans of the recent presidential elections. Whether or not you have read Carl Hiaasen before, you are in for a wild ride.From the Trade Paperback edition.

Bad Monkey

Bad Monkey

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 11/06/2013

Andrew Yancylate of the Miami Police and soon-to-be-late of the Monroe County sheriff's officehas a human arm in his freezer. There's a logical (Hiaasenian) explanation for that, but not for how and why it parted from its shadowy owner. Yancy thinks the boating-accident/shark-luncheon explanation is full of holes, and if he can prove murder, the sheriff might rescue him from his grisly Health Inspector gig (it's not called the roach patrol for nothing). But firstthis being Hiaasen countryYancy must negotiate an obstacle course of wildly unpredictable events with a crew of even more wildly unpredictable characters, including his just-ex lover, a hot-blooded fugitive from Kansas; the twitchy widow of the frozen arm; two avariciously optimistic real-estate speculators; the Bahamian voodoo witch known as the Dragon Queen, whose suitors are blinded unto death by her peculiar charms; Yancy's new true love, a kinky coroner; and the eponymous bad monkey, who with hilarious aplomb earns his place among Carl Hiaasen's greatest characters. Here is Hiaasen doing what he does better than anyone else: spinning a tale at once fiercely pointed and wickedly funny in which the greedy, the corrupt, and the degraders of what's left of pristine Floridanow, of the Bahamas as wellget their comeuppance in mordantly ingenious, diabolically entertaining fashion.From the Hardcover edition.

Chomp

Chomp

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Paperback Release Date: 02/05/2013

The hysterical no 1 New York Times bestseller by Newbery honoree Carl Hiaasen -- featuring gators, animal wranglers, inept reality TV hosts and one frozen iguana. Wahoo Cray has grown up with a zoo in his backyard - alligators, snakes, rats, monkeys and parrots ... but it's his dad who's the real unpredictable critter. When his dad takes a job with a reality TV show called EXPEDITION SURVIVAL, Wahoo figures he'll have to do a bit of wrangling himself to keep his dad from killing the show's inept star Derek Badger, who insists on using real wild animals for his stunts. And Wahoo's acquired a shadow named Tuna, a girl who's hiding from her own dad. They've only been on location in the Everglades for a day before Derek gets bitten by a bat and goes missing in a storm. Search parties promptly get lost themselves. And then Tuna's dad shows up with a gun... It's anyone's guess who will survive...

Basket Case

Basket Case

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 30/04/2013

Once a hotshot investigative reporter, Jack Tagger now bangs out obituaries for a South Florida daily, plotting to resurrect my newspaper career by yoking my byline to some famous stiff. Jimmy Stoma, the infamous front man of Jimmy and the Slut Puppies, dead in a fishy-smelling scuba accident, might be the stiff of Jacks dreamsif only he can figure out what happened.Standing in the way are (among others) his ambitious young editor, who hasnt yet fired anyone but plans to break her cherry on Jack; the rock stars pop-singer widow, whos using the occasion of her husbands death to re-launch her own career; and the soulless, profit-hungry owner of the newspaper, whom Jack once publicly humiliated at a stockholders meeting.With clues from the dead rock singers music, Jack ultimately unravels Jimmy Stomas strange fatein a hilariously hard-won triumph for muckraking journalism, and for the death-obsessed obituary writer himself.Always be halfway prepared is Jack Taggers mottoand its more than enough to guarantee a wickedly funny, brilliantly entertaining novel from Carl Hiaasen.

Lucky You

Lucky You

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 09/04/2013

Grange, Florida, is famous for its miracles--the weeping fiberglass Madonna, the Road-Stain Jesus, the stigmata man. And now it has JoLayne Lucks, unlikely winner of the state lottery.Unfortunately, JoLayne's winning ticket isn't the only one. The other belongs to Bodean Gazzer and his raunchy sidekick, Chub, who believe they're entitled to the whole $28 million jackpot. And they need it quickly, to start their own underground militia before NATO troops invade America.But JoLayne Lucks has her own plans for the Lotto money--an Eden-like forest in Grange must be saved from strip-malling. When Bode and Chub brutally assault her and steal her ticket, JoLayne vows to track them down, take it back--and get revenge.The only one who can help is Tom Krome, a big-city investigative journalist now bitterly consigned to writing frothy features for a midsized central Florida newspaper. With a persuasive nudge from JoLayne, Krome is about to become part of a story that's bigger and more bizarre than anything he's ever covered.Chasing two heavily armed psychopaths down the coast of Florida is reckless enough, but Tom's got other problems--the murderous attention of a jealous judge; an actress wife who turns fugitive to avoid divorce court; an editor who speaks in tongues; and Tom's own growing fondness for the future millionairess with whom he's risking his neck.The pursuit takes them from the surreal streets of Grange to a buzzard-infested island deep in Florida Bay, where they finally catch up with the fledgling militia--Chub, Bode Gazzer, a newly recruited convenience-store clerk and their baffled hostage, a Hooters waitress.The climax explodes with the hilarious mayhem that is Carl Hiaasen's hallmark. Lucky You is his funniest, most deliriously gripping novel yet.

Sick Puppy

Sick Puppy

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 09/04/2013

When Palmer Stoat notices the black pickup truck following him on the highway, he fears his precious Range Rover is about to be carjacked. But Twilly Spree, the man tailing Stoat, has vengeance, not sport-utility vehicles, on his mind. Idealistic, independently wealthy and pathologically short-tempered, Twilly has dedicated himself to saving Florida's wilderness from runaway destruction. He favors unambiguous political statements -- such as torching Jet-Skis or blowing up banks -- that leave his human targets shaken but re-educated.After watching Stoat blithely dump a trail of fast-food litter out the window, Twilly decides to teach him a lesson. Thus, Stoat's prized Range Rover becomes home to a horde of hungry dung beetles. Which could have been the end to it had Twilly not discovered that Stoat is one of Florida's cockiest and most powerful political fixers, whose latest project is the malling of a pristine Gulf Coast island. Now the real Hiaasen-variety fun begins . . .Dognapping eco-terrorists, bogus big-time hunters, a Republicans-only hooker, an infamous ex-governor who's gone back to nature, thousands of singing toads and a Labrador retriever greater than the sum of his Labrador parts -- these are only some of the denizens of Carl Hiaasen's outrageously funny new novel.Brilliantly twisted entertainment wrapped around a powerful ecological plea, Sick Puppy gleefully lives up to its title and gives us Hiaasen at his riotous and muckraking best.

Chomp

Chomp

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 27/03/2012

The hysterical #1 New York Times bestseller from Newbery honoree Carl Hiaasen featuring gators, snakes, bats that bite, and reality show hosts gone wild! When Wahoo Cray's dada professional animal wranglertakes a job with a reality TV show calledExpeditionSurvival!, Wahoo figures he'll have to do a bit of wrangling himself to keep his father from killing Derek Badger, the show's inept and egotistical star. But the job keeps getting more complicated: Derek Badger insists on using wild animals for his stunts; and Wahoo's acquired a shadow named Tunaa girl who's sporting a shiner courtesy ofherfather and needs a place to hide out. They've only been on location in the Everglades for a day before Derek gets bitten by a bat and goes missing in a storm. Search parties head out and promptly get lost themselves. And then Tuna's dad shows up with a gun . . . It's anyone's guess who willactuallysurviveExpedition Survival. . . ';Only in Floridaand in the fiction of its native son Carl Hiaasendoes a dead iguana fall from a palm tree and kill somebody.' New York Post ';Chomp is a delightful laugh-out-loud sendup of the surreality of TV that will be enjoyed by readers of all ages.' Los Angeles Times ';Chomp shines in its humorous, subtle tweaks on pop culture. . . . The real satisfaction, however, is not so much in the book's humor but in its truth.' Time Out Chicago KidsFrom the Hardcover edition.

Star Island

Star Island

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Hardback Release Date: 02/02/2012

Twenty-two-year-old pop star Cherry Pye is attempting a comeback from her latest drug and alcohol disaster. Ann DeLusia is Cherry's 'undercover stunt double', standing in for Cherry whenever the singer is too wasted to go out in public. But, one night, Ann-as-Cherry is mistakenly kidnapped from a Miami hotel by an obsessed paparazzo named Bang Abbott. Now the challenge for Cherry's handlers (comprising the world's pushiest stage mother; perverted record producer; nipped-and-tucked twin publicists; weed-strimmer-wielding bodyguard) is to rescue Ann while keeping her existence secret from the public. Will Bang achieve his fantasy of a private photo session with Cherry? Will Cherry sober up in time to lip-synch her concert tour and promote her new album, Skantily Klad? And will Ann escape from Cherry's shadow?

Powder Burn

Powder Burn

Author: Carl Hiaasen, Bill Montalbano Format: eBook Release Date: 28/12/2010

A Miami man witnesses a hit-and-runand winds up as live bait for drug smugglersin this crime novel by the New York Timesbestselling author of Bad Monkey. Chris Meadows's charmed life as an up-and-coming architect in Coconut Grove has kept him far removed from Miami's bloody drug trade. But his comfortable existence comes crashing down around him when Chris witnesses the hit-and-run death of an ex-girlfriend by a car full of drug smuggling gangsters. Now caught up in southern Florida's brutal underground cocaine war, Meadows is in a fight for his lifeto evade not only the hit men seeking to silence him, but also the crooked Miami cops who would rather exploit than protect him. This is the very first suspense thriller written by the New York Timesbestselling author of Razor Girl and Sick Puppy and Bill Montalbano, a writing team praised for its ';fine flair for characters and settings' (Library Journal). Those who enjoy Hiaasen's other Florida thrillers, the Doc Ford novels by Randy Wayne White, or Netflix's Narcos will want to discover these early crime fiction gems.

Trap Line

Trap Line

Author: Carl Hiaasen, Bill Montalbano Format: eBook Release Date: 28/12/2010

A Key West fishing captain takes on Florida's drug lords in this crime novel from the New York Timesbestselling author of Bad Monkey. Though he is one of Key West's most skilled fishing captains, Breeze Albury barely ekes out a living on the meager earnings of his trade. Meanwhile, Cuban and Colombian drug smugglers thrive all aroundand they have their sights set on Albury and his fishing boat. After the smugglers cut his three hundred trap lines and crush his livelihood, Albury is forced to run drugs to survive. But when he gets busted by the crooked chief of police and becomes a target of the drug machine's brutal hit men, Albury becomes a vigilante on the seas of Florida, unleashing a fiery and relentless vengeance on the most dangerous criminals south of Miami. Along with Powder Burn and A Death in China, this is one of the early suspense thrillers written by Carl Hiaasen and Bill Montalbano, a writing team praised for their ';fine flair for characters and settings' (Library Journal). Perfect for fans of the Doc Ford novels by Randy Wayne White, Trap Lineis an action-packed preview of Hiaasen's stellar Florida-set crime novels including Sick Puppy, Tourist Season, and Razor Girl.

Death in China

Death in China

Author: Carl Hiaasen, Bill Montalbano Format: eBook Release Date: 28/12/2010

An American investigates a murder amid the secrecy and corruption of China in this crime thriller from the New York Timesbestselling author of Razor Girl. Art history professor Tom Stratton hasn't seen his former mentor David Wang for yearsuntil they unexpectedly run into each other while Stratton is on a guided tour of China. But the reunion doesn't last long. After Wang is found deadand the American embassy fumbles the investigationStratton sets out to solve the mystery of the killing on his own. Before long, he's tangled in a web of corruption that reaches the highest seats of power. Beset by the suffocating secrecy and subterfuge of communist China, Stratton must find his friend's murdererbefore the fury of a brutal conspiracy closes in on him. Along with Powder Burn and Trap Line, this international mystery is one of the early suspense thrillers written by Carl Hiaasen and Bill Montalbano, a writing team praised for their ';fine flair for characters and settings' (Library Journal).

Star Island

Star Island

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 27/07/2010

Meet twenty-two-year-old Cherry Pye (ne Cheryl Bunterman), a pop star since she was fourteenand about to attempt a comeback from her latest drug-and-alcohol disaster. Now meet Cherry again: in the person of her undercover stunt double, Ann DeLusia. Ann portrays Cherry whenever the singer is too indisposedmeaning wastedto go out in public. And it is Ann-mistaken-for-Cherry who is kidnapped from a South Beach hotel by obsessed paparazzo Bang Abbott. Now the challenge for Cherrys handlers (berstage mother; horndog record producer; nipped, tucked, and Botoxed twin publicists; weed whackerwielding bodyguard) is to rescue Ann while keeping her existence a secret from Cherrys publicand from Cherry herself.The situation is more complicated than they know. Ann has had a bewitching encounter with Skinkthe unhinged former governor of Florida living wild in a mangrove swampand now hes heading for Miami to find her . . .Will Bang Abbott achieve his fantasy of a lucrative private photo session with Cherry Pye? Will Cherry sober up in time to lip-synch her way through her concert tour? Will Skink track down Ann DeLusia before Cherrys motley posse does?All will be revealed in this hilarious spin on life in the celebrity fast lane.

Paradise Screwed

Paradise Screwed

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 13/09/2009

"e;Along with Kick Ass, this is one of the best collections of occasional journalism published in recent years."e;--Booklist (starred review)

Scat

Scat

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 27/01/2009

From Newbery Honoree Carl Hiaasen comes this New York Times bestseller set in Florida's Everglades in which an eccentric eco-avenger, a stuffed rat named Chelsea, a wannabe Texas oilman, a singing substitute teacher, and a ticked-off panther can't stop two kids on a mission to find their missing teacher! Bunny Starch, the most feared biology teacher ever, is missing. She disappeared after a school field trip to Black Vine Swamp. And, to be honest, the kids in her class are relieved. But when the principal tries to tell the students that Mrs. Starch has been called away on a "e;family emergency,"e; Nick and Marta just don't buy it. No, they figure the class delinquent, Smoke, has something to do with her disappearance. And he does! But not in the way they think. There's a lot more going on in Black Vine Swamp than any one player in this twisted tale can see. It's all about to hit the fan, and when it does, the bad guys better scat. ';Ingenious . . . Scat won't disappoint Hiaasenphiles of any age.' The New York Times ';Woohoo! It's time for another trip to Floridascrewy, gorgeous Florida, with its swamps and scammers and strange creatures (two- and four-legged). Our guide, of course, is Carl Hiaasen.' DenverPost.comFrom the Hardcover edition.

Downhill Lie

Downhill Lie

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 20/05/2008

Originally drawn to the game by his father, Carl Hiaasen wisely quit golfing in 1973. But some ambitions refuse to die, and as the yearsand memories of shanked 7-irons faded, it dawned on Carl that there might be one thing in life he could do better in middle age than he could as a youth. So gradually he ventured back to the dreaded driving range, this time as the father of a five-year-old sonand also as a grandfather. What possesses a man to return in midlife to a game at which hed never excelled in his prime, and which in fact had dealt him mostly failure, angst and exasperation? Heres why I did it: Im one sick bastard. And thus we have Carls foray into a world of baffling titanium technology, high-priced golf gurus, bizarre infomercial gimmicks and the mind-bending phenomenon of Tiger Woods; a maddening universe of hooks and slices where Carl ultimatelyand foolishlyagrees to compete in a country-club tournament against players who can actually hit the ball. Thats the secret of the sports infernal seduction, he writes. It surrenders just enough good shots to let you talk yourself out of quitting.Hiaasens chronicle of his shaky return to this bedeviling pastime and the ensuing demolition of his self-esteemculminating with the savage 45-hole tournamentwill have you rolling with laughter. Yet the bittersweet memories of playing with his own father and the glow he feels when watching his own young son belt the ball down the fairway will also touch your heart. Forget Tiger, Phil and Ernie. If you want to understand the true lure of golf, turn to Carl Hiaasen, who offers an extraordinary audiobook for the ordinary hacker.From the Trade Paperback edition.

Nature Girl

Nature Girl

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 14/11/2006

Honey Santanaimpassioned, willful, possibly bipolar, self-proclaimed queen of lost causeshas a scheme to help rid the world of irresponsibility, indifference, and dinnertime sales calls. Shes taking rude, gullible Relentless, Inc., telemarketer Boyd Shreave and his less-than-enthusiastic mistress, Eugenie, into the wilderness of Floridas Ten Thousand Islands for a gentle lesson in civility.What she doesnt know is that shes being followed by her Honey-obsessed former employer, Piejack. And he doesnt know hes being followed by Honeys still-smitten former-drug-running ex-husband, Perry, and their wise-and-protective-way-beyond-his-years twelve-year-old son, Fry. And when they all pull up on Dismal Key, they dont know theyre intruding on Sammy Tigertail, a half whitehalf Seminole failed alligator wrestler, trying like hell to be a hermit despite the Florida State coed whos dying to be his hostage.From the Compact Disc edition.

Skinny Dip

Skinny Dip

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 24/10/2006

Chaz Perrone might be the only marine scientist in the world who doesnt know which way the Gulf Stream runs. He might also be the only one who went into biology just to make a killing, and now hes found a waydoctoring water samples so that a ruthless agribusiness tycoon can continue illegally dumping fertilizer into the endangered Everglades. When Chaz suspects that his wife, Joey, has figured out his scam, he pushes her overboard from a cruise liner into the night-dark Atlantic. Unfortunately for Chaz, his wife doesnt die in the fall.Clinging blindly to a bale of Jamaican pot, Joey Perrone is plucked from the ocean by former cop and current loner Mick Stranahan. Instead of rushing to the police and reporting her husbands crime, Joey decides to stay dead and (with Micks help) screw with Chaz until he screws himself.As Joey haunts and taunts her homicidal husband, as Chazs cold-blooded cohorts in pollution grow uneasy about his ineptitude and increasingly erratic behavior, as Mick Stranahan discovers that six failed marriages and years of island solitude havent killed the reckless romantic in him, were taken on a hilarious, full-throttle, pure Hiaasen ride through the warped politics and mayhem of the human environment, and the human heart.

Hoot

Hoot

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 27/06/2006

This Newbery Honor-winning, hilarious Floridian adventure involves new kids, bullies, alligators, eco-warriors, pancakes, pint-sized owls, and more. A New York Times bestseller!Everybody loves Mother Paula's pancakes. Everybody, that is, except the colony of cute but endangered owls that live on the building site of the new restaurant. Can the awkward new kid and his feral friend prank the pancake people out of town? Or is the owls' fate cemented in pancake batter?';A wonderful tour de-force.' The Boston Globe ';A rollicking, righteous story.' The Miami Herald ';Yes, it is a hoot.'The Washington PostFrom the Hardcover edition.

Flush

Flush

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: eBook Release Date: 27/06/2006

Take a romp in the swamp with this New York Times bestselling mystery adventure set in the Florida Keys from Newbery Honoree Carl Hiaasen! Noah's dad is sure that the owner of the Coral Queen casino boat is flushing raw sewage into the harborwhich has made taking a dip at the local beach like swimming in a toilet. He can't prove it though, and so he decides that sinking the boat will make an effective statement. Right. The boat is pumped out and back in business within days and Noah's dad is in the local lock-up. Now Noah is determined to succeed where his dad failed. He will prove that the Coral Queen is dumping illegally . . . somehow.';The writing is pitch perfect.' The New York Times ';A royal flush.' Chicago Sun-Times ';Classic Hiaasenlaugh-out-loud satire in a Florida setting.' LifeFrom the Hardcover edition.

Flush

Flush

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Paperback Release Date: 01/06/2006

Noah's dad, Paine, is a kind but slightly irresponsible fisherman who is passionate about saving the local Florida aquatic life.When Paine discovers that a local businessman is running a scam from his casino boat, he takes the law into his own hands, sinks the boat and ends up in jail.This scam involves releasing the effluent from the boat's toilets directly into the water, to avoid the cost of disposing of it safely. Noah and his sister Abbey, take up the fight for justice on their Dad's behalf and enlist the help of Shelly, who knows that her former boyfriend is up to no good and comes up with a plan to prove it.She gets a job as a barmaid back on the casino boat and plans to sneak a huge load of coloured dye into the toilets. A fantastically funny thriller - to find out more visit www.haveyouflushed.co.uk

Hoot

Hoot

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Paperback Release Date: 01/10/2002

Roy Eberhardt is recently arrived in Florida. `Disney World is an armpit compared to Montana', he announces. Roy's family moves a lot so he's used to the new-kid drill - and to bullies like Dana Matherson. And anyway, it's because of Dana that Roy gets to see the mysterious running boy - who runs away from the school bus and who has no books, no backpack and, most oddly, no shoes. Sensing a mystery Roy starts to trail the mystery runner - a chase that will introduce him to many weird Floridian creatures: potty-trained alligators, some cute burrowing owls, a fake-fart champion, a sinister pancake PR man and some snakes with sparkly tails...Suddenly life in Florida is looking up!

Kick Ass Selected Columns of Carl Hiaasen

Kick Ass Selected Columns of Carl Hiaasen

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Hardback Release Date: 30/11/1999

Beginning with Welcome to South Florida , a chapter introducing such everyday events as animal sacrifice, riots at the beach, and a shootout over limes at the supermarket, this collection organizes over 200 columns into 18 chapters, chronicling events and defining the issues that have kept the South Florida melting pot bubbling throughout the '80s and '90s. An introductory essay provides an overview of Hiassen's career and outlines his principal concerns as a journalist.

Team Rodent - Lib Contemp Thought

Team Rodent - Lib Contemp Thought

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Paperback Release Date: 05/05/1998

Strip Tease

Strip Tease

Author: Carl Hiaasen Format: Paperback Release Date: 12/08/1994

'The world is a sewer ...and we're all dodging s*!*...' Welcome to the Eager Beaver ...not just a topless fun palace in the heart of southern Florida's deadliest human swamp, but the mega-sleazy backdrop to the juiciest scandal in Miami's entirely colourful history. It's enough to say it begins with the sex-addled political fixer 'Moldy Moldowski', Erin the beautiful stripper and a champagne bottle ...and ends in a riotous cocktail of blackmail, comedy and cover-ups starring grotesques great and small. Enough to say it could only be Carl Hiaasen. And he's simply the best there is. 'A neat indictment of the US political system, a sly reminder of how pathetic men are, a beautifully timed thriller and - this is the important bit - very funny indeed' GQ 'Hilairious...this novel could be dangerous to your ribs. Keep an eye on Erin. She, and Strip Tease, are winners' New York Times

Author Info

Author's Website

http://www.carlhiaasen.com/

Author's Facebook

Find Carl Hiaasen on Facebook

Twitter Updates

If this is your author page then you can share your Twitter updates with your readers right here on LoveReading

Find out more