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Audiobooks Narrated by Gregory Dwyer
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"This collection of stories explores the hidden, sentient lives of discarded objects in a fictional city. The narrative is set in the “Residual World”, a subterranean reality where waste and debris possess memories, emotions, and a shared history. Through personified characters like Barnaby and Matilda, two pieces of canine waste whose union eventually leads to the sprouting of a dandelion, the author illustrates themes of reincarnation and resilience. Other tales detail the unlikely bonds formed between forgotten items, such as a bent key and a chipped button, which together find new purpose through artistic intervention. The chronicles suggest that nothing is ever truly finished, as even the most overlooked urban fragments contribute to a profound, secret legacy. Ultimately, the work serves as a poetic reflection on the value of the neglected and the persistence of connection amidst urban decay."
"In the surreal academic landscape of Tumbarumba, history professor Stella Pontifex discovers that grease is not merely a culinary byproduct but a metaphysical archive of human memory. As the world suffers from “The Great Sizzle” and a subsequent “thinning” of reality known as attenuation, Stella is contacted by the spirits of legendary Grease Prophets like Frank and Glen. These apparitions warn her that corporate interests and a fanatical cult, the Way of Dryness, are draining the universe of its viscosity and historical depth. To prevent existence from becoming a brittle, unseasoned husk, Stella must travel through bureaucratic afterlives and commercialised voids to understand how to preserve cosmic lubricity. Ultimately, she becomes a quiet custodian of memory, using her scholarly discipline to mend the shimmering currents of a world threatened by spiritual evaporation."
"Pope Blatantly IV wishes to return to the papal autocracy of the Middle Ages. He devises a threefold plan: 1) to enforce universal Catholic geographical supremacy, 2) to criminalize sin, and 3) to ban “grease” in favor of doctrinal “dryness.” The Pope’s outlandish initiatives include annexing Antarctica using a team of bodybuilders and gluing borders, and monetizing salvation through Indulgences 2.0 and Pre-Death Canonizations. In opposition to the Pope’s extravagant claims, the “Grease Underground,” is formed. The leader is the Grease Prophet Frank, who champions cosmic viscosity and rebellion, and who is assisted by apostles, monks, and an alcoholic priest whose miraculous flask heals the dryness. The conflict culminates in a “Greasequake,” which triggers the forced resignation of Blatantly IV, and the final scene suggests a return to theological harmony as Grace and Grease emulsify."
"The death of Maxilodimus Cruett, who drowns in a vat of oil, sparks a global controversy. Society becomes divided into Rationalists, Pilgrims, and various new theological groups who debate whether the event was murder, a miracle, or a “merger” of substance and consciousness. Grease itself starts to become sentient—it begins to hum, speak, and eventually organize, eventually forming an international commission. Legal battles ensue, culminating in a global strike where all lubrication ceases, with disastrous results for worldwide infrastructure. Central to the conflict are Frank and Glen, the self-proclaimed apostles of viscosity, who are ultimately denounced by the Droplet General, the political and religious leader of the fluids, for crimes of metaphysical exploitation. The story concludes with the difficult search for a lasting equilibrium between matter and meaning, where grease is recognized not as a metaphor, but as an essential, self-aware component of existence."
"Our story begins with the programmer, Allosaurus Triplicate, who inadvertently creates the Realm of the Unwritten—a dimension populated by unfinished and deleted text fragments that achieve sentience, including the letter V. This symbolic dimension soon descends into turmoil through the creation of Antinomy, a paradoxical entity that seeks to monetize and control all expression, leading to a global linguistic crisis where meaning and grammar collapse. The story follows several key figures—Allosaurus, the resistant letter V, the philosopher Artaxerxes the Roadmender, and the culinary prophets Frank and Glen—who champion “grease” as a sacred force of slippage and imperfection necessary for linguistic freedom, Ultimately, with the assistance of legendary detective Xerxes Fiddlefaddle, a diplomatic Declaration of Shared Syntax is established to restore balance between human speech and symbolic existence."
"The Fryer Ascends is a theological and culinary epic detailing a conflict between the forces of flavor and imperfection (represented by the prophets Frank and Glen the Fryer) and the forces of order and blandness (led by the metaphysical entity Softly, the Adverb, and the Bureau of Blandness). The narrative charts Frank’s journey as he confronts Softly’s attempts to sterilize existence by controlling grammar and grease, which leads to “The Great Drying” where all flavor disappears. Frank’s exile and Glen’s revelations ultimately lead to a cosmic fry-off that melts reality’s rigid crust and a literal transformation where the Gospel becomes edible. The story concludes with the reconciliation of chaos and order, symbolized by the Final Receipt requiring an act of honest cleaning, signifying that true holiness lies in acknowledging and caring for the “spills” of life."
"The Wombat Ultimatum which describes a chaotic societal crisis following the kidnapping of the adverb “Softly” by marsupial revolutionaries. The main conflict pits the prophetic tobacconist and wombat leader Runciman, who champions “blunt grammar” and the rejection of all adverbs, against the spiritual cooks, Frank and Glen, who represent the esoteric faith of “Greasehood” and the necessity of nuance. This linguistic rebellion leads to a Great Grammatical Panic, where sentences fracture, conjunctions vanish, and the world is stripped of descriptive modifiers, forcing society to speak only in terse, authoritarian imperatives. Through a series of metaphorical culinary events, including the Feast of Misplaced Modifiers, the protagonists discover that the solution is not to defeat the rebels, but to embrace patience and mercy, which are understood as essential forms of linguistic “grease” or seasoning. The story culminates in the realization that language must adopt a slower, more deliberate tempo after the adverb “Quickly” dies from exhaustion, demonstrating that true meaning requires both flavor and breath to sustain its structure."
"A metaphysical crisis occurs when the note C sharp mysteriously vanishes after being played perfectly by the pianist Jonathan Blenheim. The absence causes tonal collapse worldwide, leading to chaos in orchestras and triggering a bureaucratic panic at the Bureau of Eclectic Notation (BEN). The Bureau attempts to force the note D Flat into substitution, to be met with fierce opposition by D Flat. The narrative follows the adventures of the missing C sharp, which has been transposed into the viscosity of frying grease within Wotof Wongip’s chip shop, becoming a sentient sound that seeks resolution through “grease-touch” and memory. Ultimately, characters including Detective Fiddlefaddle, the Fryer Prophet Frank, and the adverbial entity Softly work to resolve the harmonic viscosity. Eventually the note is facilitated to make an imperfect, merciful return, and the crisis between pitch and substance is finally resolved."
"This is the story of a theological conflict concerning the concepts of “grace” versus “grease.” The “cult of Frank,” a religious movement advocating the salvific potential of viscosity, frying, and culinary lubrication is gaining many converts. The story opens with a sermon by Father Anselm Loosespring, a Frankite advocate, who promotes “holy grease” as essential for faith, spirituality, and combating Frank’s opponent, the Adversarial Tobacconist, Runciman. The major opponent of the message and practices of Frank is the Vatican. Pope Blatantly III attempts to suppress the Frankite heresy through bureaucratic measures, counter-propaganda, and eventually claims papal ownership of all metaphysical grease under Canon Law 888B. His campaign is bolstered by a suggestion by scholar Monsignor Monsignorson that grace and grease share a common lexical root. The Pope also engages an assassin, Annibale Urkleson, to eliminate Frank and his apostle Glen. This diabolic plan fails when Urkleson is converted from his fell purpose by Cheryl, one of Frank’s disciples. The Vatican’s regulatory efforts eventually fail when a “Great Grease Schism” culminates in Rome being flooded by “holy viscosity.”"
"This pseudo-theological narrative chronicle details the spiritual journey of a man named Glen, who is called to become The Fryer, a prophet of viscosity and fried food. Included among the significant issues and events are The Fryer’s initial revelation, a growing understanding of the doctrine of Grease as the memory of heat, the establishment of the secret society known as The Order of the Greasy Spoon, and his ritual performance of The Fifteen Sizzlings. Glen experiences a profound conflict with the sterile Dry Ones, an inevitable immersion in The Dark Night of the Stove, and an eventual physical encounter with the ordinary yet divine figure of Frank, who teaches him that true holiness resides in the quiet, messy act of everyday cooking. Ultimately, The Fryer realizes his ministry is not about grand pronouncements but the simple, shared Feast of Final Breakfast, demonstrating that life’s meaning is found in practical effort and human connection."
"This is the story of Gregory Thistlethwaite, an unremarkable student, who is commanded by an authoritative, disembodied voice—claiming to be Jordan Peterson—to clean his room as a metaphorical path to ontological and psychological order. We track Gregory’s progress through increasingly absurd and metaphysical challenges, including finding a “Room Beneath the Room” (the psychological shadow) and undergoing “The Trial of the Lobster,” which is framed as a confrontation with dominance hierarchies. Ultimately, Gregory learns that true order requires humility and continual maintenance, and that perfection, or seeking approval, is less important than engaging responsibly with the inevitable mess of existence."
"Your kids will love reading the weird and wonderful facts about Australia in this fun book!Check out this hilarious Australian kids book, chock full of amazing facts, trivia and stories.
Learn about Australia in this amusing and entertaining children’s book, which will appeal to the adults too.
You will laugh and you will gasp, and then you will want to explore Australia and see its amazing animals and places for yourself.
Can you answer these questions:
o What name was almost used for Vegemite?
o Who fought the Emu Wars?
o Is Australia an island?
o What shape is wombat poo?
o What is the unique secret of emu’s feathers?
o What is the big controversy over the pavlova?
o Why was a book written about the anzac biscuit?
o Is Cow Bay named after a dairy cow?
o Is Uluru the world’s largest rock?
o What’s unique about the dinosaur fossils at Lark Quarry?
o What did First Nations Australians use as a football?
Australia is a huge country and it is a really unique and amazing place, and not just because of its sharks, crocodiles, spiders and snakes?
Kids love fun facts and parents love to see kids reading!This book makes a terrific gift for the children in your life!"
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