"Award-winning and bestselling author William Kotzwinkle is back with the second in the darkly comedic Felonious Monk series featuring Tommy Martini, a Benedictine monk with an anger management problem. Felonious Monk was praised as “amiably satirical” (Washington Post) and “a whiplash adventure” (Wall Street Journal).
Coalville is on fire—from below. The old mines are burning, and everyone has poison gas in their brain. Maybe that’s why the town is so corrupt. Now that he’s a Benedictine monk, Tommy Martini never wants to see the place again—hell-raisers there hold a grudge till they die, and he’s on their wish list. But a girl he once loved has gone missing, and his best friend from childhood has been murdered. Among the living is a shy girl from Tommy’s past, who wants to help. Together, they learn the secret of the elephant’s graveyard, and it’s not in Africa.
At the heart of Coalville is Parade Square, with plenty of pigeons, drugs, and child prostitution. It’s the new small-town America, where Dionysus is dancing once again. William Kotzwinkle’s insight into this paradigm shift is shot through with the humor he is famous for, and the result is a spicy brew, a bloody martini—just one sip may keep you up all night."
"Meet Tommy Martini, the monk with an anger management problem. Since killing somebody with a single punch is not a needed talent in a monastery, he spends his time praying, meditating, and taking his anger management medicine. But his meditations are interrupted by a legacy from his uncle, a crooked priest. Arriving in a New Age Arizona town to claim his inheritance, Brother Tommy meets a charismatic, smoking-hot cult leader who claims that women are being impregnated by alien beings while they sleep. Tommy’s own sleep is disturbed—by cartel hitmen, Mafia bill collectors, and women intrigued by his vow of chastity. He loses his anger management medicine in time to deal with the hitmen, but the women present an uphill battle.
William Kotzwinkle’s quicksilver touch has produced an effervescent piece of entertainment filled with suspense, turns you won’t see coming, and the humor for which he is famous."
"Walter's family is holding a yard sale, but there are few customers. Walter, fartingcontentedly near Father, wonders why. When a man offers ten dollars for Walter, Father readily agrees. Walter wonders why. Walter is sad to leave his family behind, but relieved to discover that his new owner is a clown. Walter figures he will help the clown bring joy to children on their birthdays. But the clown has a dastardly plot: he will use Walter's gas to inflate balloons and then pop them to stun guards during bank robberies. Will Walter turn to the dark side? Of course not! He comes out a hero and is reunited with his family by doing what he does best."
"Walter the Farting Dog is now a hero of the high seas!Everybody is having a great time on a cruise . . . until a terrible odor permeates the ship. All signs point to Walter, and so he is first banished down below, with the stinky cheeses, and then into a lifeboat to float behind the ocean liner. Then catastrophe strikes! How long will the great cruise ship and its frightened passengers be marooned on the high seas? About as long as it takes Walter to digest that cheese!"
"Professor Kompressor visits Walter's family, offering a remedy for the dog's digestive disorder: special food that must be mixed in his Kompressatron. Unfortunately, the professor's cure doesn't work, so Father has to take matters into his own hands. Father's combination of ingredients has a strange effect on the pooch. Walter blows up like a balloon and floats out the window! Just when it looks as though Walter's paws may never touch Earth again, he encounters a flock of butterflies in distress. Only he has the hot air that can save them from an icy death. once he lets it rip, Walter's flying days are over. (Or are they?) Plenty of laughs and cheers will arise from this story that takes walter to new heights."
