Louisa Pateman - Author

Single, Again, and Again, and Again ... What Do You Do When Life Doesn't Go to Plan?

In 'Single, Again, and Again, and Again...What Do You Do When Life Doesn't Go to Plan' Louisa Pateman eloquently describes her experiences in the dating jungle of the 90s and noughties and goes on, when her 'happy ever after' still doesn't happen, to explain how she eventually resolved her issues and found that the mould, formed for her by her upbringing, was not set in stone and could be broken. The first part of the book resonated a lot with me, as I was also playing the dating game at this time, the only difference being that I had already been married and had a family. I recognised many of the male types that she dated, having had some similar encounters, some funny, some heart-breaking or, on occasion, just plain boring!  The second part moves on to the digital age, which I was not familiar with personally, but which didn't prove to be any more successful for the author in finding 'the right one'. Much more importantly though, the end of the noughties heralded a shift in society's view of the status of women and the expectations and acceptance of what constitutes a 'family'. The author could at last abandon her 'life plan' and fulfil her lifelong ambition to be a mother. This is an uplifting book, that debunks the myth of the happy couple ending, perpetuated in literature and the film and TV industry. There's a long way to go yet, as the #MeToo movement shows but, in the author's own words 'Imagine how much happier and freer young women would feel if they had a deeply embedded notion of choice, of carving out their own unique path...that you don't need to wait for your Prince Charming, that you can create an extraordinary life just on your own'. Drena Irish, A LoveReading Ambassador