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Audiobooks Narrated by Joe Hempel
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Since Night of the Living Dead, zombies have been a frightening fixture on the pop culture landscape, lumbering after hapless humans, slurping up brains and veins and whatever warm, fleshy matter they can clench in their rotting limbs. But what if they were real? What would happen if, tomorrow, corpses across the nation began springing up out of their graves and terrorizing the living? Employing hard science and solid police work-not to mention jaw-dropping (literally!) humor-Zombie CSU is the only guide available to staying alive and avoiding the undead. At last listeners can:
● Investigate zombie crime scenes, collecting and analyzing evidence of zombie attacks
● Examine the psychology of the zombie and develop a perp profile
● Observe medical science pros as they probe felled zombies for forensic clues
● Devise a zombie apocalypse survival scorecard and more!
Complete with lists of must-see zombie flicks from around the globe and tons of tips for kicking undead butt, Zombie CSU features hundreds of interviews with real zombie experts, forensics experts, detectives, filmmakers, and more.
We guarantee this is the only tool you need to survive the zombie apocalypse.
OK, that's not really true. But when the SHTF you're going to want a survival guide that's not just geared toward day-to-day survival. You'll need one that addresses the essential skills for true nourishment of the human spirit. Living through the end of the world isn't worth a damn unless you can enjoy yourself in any way you want. (Except, of course, for anything having to do with abuse. We could never condone such things. At least the publisher's lawyers say we can't.)
We can't guarantee this guide will save your life. But we can guarantee it will keep you smiling while the living dead are chowing down on you.
Learn how to tell a good story with Your Story, Well Told! Jam-packed with some of the best storytelling strategies, this manual gives creatives the confidence bump they need to make the sale, land the client, propose a toast, or impress their date.
The following is (not) a work of fiction. We've all got stories to tell-but how do you make your story the best story? In Your Story, Well Told!, Moth veteran Corey Rosen inspires you to get on stage and tell your story. Using the best storytelling techniques from improvisational theater, Rosen designs an accessible guide for all ages and skill levels. Crafted to help ordinary people tell extraordinary stories, this laugh out loud handbook covers everything from how to tell a good story to going off script.
Spontaneous stories to tell. The best storytelling uses improvisation to enthrall, entertain, and keep audiences on edge. Laugh along with tales of performance triumphs (and disasters) and explore ways to tell your story with confidence and spontaneity. From brainstorming and development to performance and memorization techniques, you'll learn how to tell a good story with a variety of structures and editing approaches that bring out your best story; improv exercises to stimulate creativity without feeling foolish; and quick and easy lessons on building stories to tell.
A bodyguard . . . really?
Sentinel city is quickly recovering from the events of the month earlier. Conryu Koda, the world's only male wizard, and, many would say, savior of the city, is enjoying the last few days of his summer vacation. His enjoyment comes to a screeching halt when he gets a call from Orin Kane, the chief of the city's Department of Magic.
Conryu arrives at the Department and is introduced to the stunning Anya Kazakov. She has information the Department wants and he's the price. Conryu agrees to protect her, not realizing what he's getting into.
Wrath of the Dragon Czar is a world-spanning adventure that'll take Conryu from the relative safety of the academy to the middle of a war between monsters on the other side of the planet.
The world ended. The Night killed it.
X is trapped living in the slums of the last remaining city on Earth. He can only venture out beyond the towering walls to scavenge relics of the old world when the sun is up.
At night, like everybody else, he hides inside from the monsters of the shadows . . . until an unexpected death occurs a little too close to home. With the blame on his shoulders, and trigger-happy guards on his trail, X has no choice but to run.
But the city was never a safe place to begin with, not really, and his only slim chance of survival lies outside the walls, in a landscape empty of humanity-and full of the darkness that wiped it out.
Ember 'Emmy' Kenston was raised in the spotlight when all she wanted was to be invisible. A self-proclaimed book nerd, she must live up to the expectations of being the daughter of one of Hollywood's biggest actresses. Retreating to Archibald Reynolds College gives her a fresh start where she attends classes and happily spends her evenings in the library trying not to be noticed, but Chad notices anyway.
Chad is a squirrel shifter and the only non-canine in the D.O.G. House. He's totally gorgeous, in the warmer seasons at least, and has made quite the name for himself around campus. Most of the school year he has girls throwing themselves at him, but he's seen how his brothers are with their true mates, and wants nothing less than to be loved for who he is, not for his summer body. As long as she's a squirrel of course.
Longing for a mate in no way prepares him for the moment when he first hears her inside his head. The problem is, Ember doesn't know what's happening. And worse, Chad's biggest fear is realized . . . her animal spirit is not a squirrel.
Can Chad push past his prejudices and accept her as his mate? Or will he turn away from his one true mate forever?
Contains mature themes.
You waste time. You complain. You make excuses. And you procrastinate.
Are you tired of yourself yet?
Your loved ones are too nice to say it to your face, but there’s a reason you aren’t getting what you want despite being capable of achieving it.
You steal from your heroes and you plan all you want, and yet you are still standing in the same place. Why We Don’t Achieve Sh*t will outline exactly why you are more than capable and yet fail to see your goals through to the end. Toxic friendships, negotiable goals, procrastination, and lack of deadlines—Why We Don’t Achieve Sh*t addresses why you aren’t getting what you deserve and how to opt out of this loop.
That is, unless you’re seriously not sick and tired of this sh*t yet. Everyone else is.
Of all the white American pop music groups that hit the charts before the Beatles, only the Beach Boys continued to thrive throughout the British Invasion to survive into the 1970s and beyond. The Beach Boys helped define both sides of the era we broadly call the sixties, split between their early surf, car, and summer pop and their later hippie, counterculture, and ambitious rock. No other group can claim the Ronettes and the Four Seasons as early 1960s rivals; the Mamas and the Papas and Crosby, Stills and Nash as later 1960s rivals; and the Beatles and the Temptations as decade-spanning counterparts.
This is the first book to take an honest look at the themes running through the Beach Boys’ art and career as a whole and to examine where they sit inside our culture and politics—and why they still grab our attention.
Daniel Hill will never forget the day he heard these words: "Daniel, you may be white, but don't let that lull you into thinking you have no culture. White culture is very real. In fact, when white culture comes in contact with other cultures, it almost always wins. So it would be a really good idea for you to learn about your culture."
Confused and unsettled by this encounter, Hill began a journey of understanding his own white identity. Today he is an active participant in addressing and confronting racial and systemic injustices. And in this compelling and timely book, he shows you the seven stages to expect on your own path to cultural awakening.
It's crucial to understand both personal and social realities in the areas of race, culture, and identity. This book will give you a new perspective on being white and also empower you to be an agent of reconciliation in our increasingly diverse and divided world.
Nicholas Sparks meets The Empty Man in this modern Southern Gothic horror about a palm reader swept up in a disturbing missing-child case with a twist you won’t see coming.
After striking out on her own as a teen mom, Madi Price is forced to return to her hometown of Brandywine, Virginia, with her seventeen-year-old daughter. With nothing to her name, she scrapes together a living as a palm reader at the local farmers market.
It’s there that she connects with old high school flame Henry McCabe, now a reclusive local fisherman whose infant son, Skyler, went missing five years ago. Everyone in town is sure Skyler is dead, but when Madi reads Henry’s palm, she’s haunted by strange and disturbing visions that suggest otherwise. As she follows the thread of these visions, Madi discovers a terrifying nightmare waiting at the center of the labyrinth—and it’s coming for everyone she holds dear.
Combining supernatural horror with domestic suspense into a visceral exploration of parental grief, What Kind of Mother cements Clay McLeod Chapman’s reputation as a “star” (Vulture) and “the twenty-first century’s Richard Matheson” (Richard Chizmar, Chasing the Boogeyman).
What is it like to be a dog? A bat? Or a dolphin? To find out, neuroscientist Gregory Berns and his team began with a radical step: they taught dogs to go into an MRI scanner-completely awake. They discovered what makes dogs individuals with varying capacities for self-control, different value systems, and a complex understanding of human speech. And dogs were just the beginning. In What It's Like to Be a Dog, Berns explores the fascinating inner lives of wild animals from dolphins and sea lions to the extinct Tasmanian tiger. Much as Silent Spring transformed how we thought about the environment, so What It's Like to Be a Dog will fundamentally reshape how we think about-and treat-animals. Groundbreaking and deeply humane, it is essential listening for animal lovers of all stripes.
My life was on track.
The plan? Finish my MBA. Get out of the hotel. Finally date James, my manager.
With only three months left, everything was set.
Then he walked in.
What I thought was just a difficult guest toppled my life in ways I didn't plan for. He was an asshole, demanding, and more alluring than should be legal.
I had a path.
He destroyed it.
What now?
Contains mature themes.
