Audiobooks by Ben Elton

What Have I Done?: My Autobiography Audiobook

"Read by the author, Ben Elton What has Ben Elton done? He's written the most eagerly anticipated show business autobiography of the year. That's what. And prior to that? Well he's pretty much done everything and worked with everybody and now he's telling the whole story in one unputdownable volume. Sixty-five years in the making, this frank, forthright and hugely entertaining autobiography takes a deep dive into Ben's life and times, both private and public. He reveals the true stories behind iconic hits such as The Young Ones, Blackadder and We Will Rock You, his pioneering routines hosting Saturday Live, which birthed a revolution in stand-up comedy, and so much more. Ben recounts his life and uniquely varied career from his Catford childhood and being the BBC's youngest ever sit com writer at 21 right up to the present day, with yet another hit sit com, Upstart Crow; a surprise late-life BAFTA; and his most critically acclaimed stand-up comedy show to date. Alongside unique insights into his ground-breaking work, Ben talks honestly and compellingly about his personal and professional relationships with two generations of brilliant friends, inspiring contemporaries, occasional foes, and the times in which they all lived. And Ben's life has been just as challenging, rewarding and funny off screen as it has been on. He unpacks it all with wit, insight and complete honesty. And of course, there's a 'little bit of politics'. For forty-five years Ben's been making a lot of people laugh, a lot of people think and getting on quite a lot of people's wicks. All of which means he has a lot of stories and he tells them unvarnished and uncensored - he's sharing his truth as they say these days, and he's up to his neck in it!"

Ben Elton (Author), Ben Elton (Narrator)

Audiobook

The Young Ones: The Complete BBC TV Soundtracks

"The complete television soundtracks of all 12 episodes of the legendary BBC sitcom Ground-breaking, satirical and anarchic, The Young Ones introduced alternative comedy to mainstream TV, and made household names of its writers and performers. It ran for two series on BBC Two between 1982 and 1984, winning a host of devoted fans and a BAFTA Award for its second series. A world away from the cosy suburban sitcoms that preceded it, the show centred around four degenerate students sharing a squalid North London house: hippy Neil (Nigel Planer), right-on Rick (Rik Mayall), Mike 'TheCoolPerson' (Chris Ryan) and punk psycho Vyvyan (Ade Edmondson). Alexei Sayle co-starred as the various members of the dodgy Balowski family, and the plethora of guest stars included Dawn French, Jennifer Saunders, Stephen Fry, Hugh Laurie, Robbie Coltrane, Emma Thompson and series co-writer Ben Elton. Musical interludes were provided by top bands such as Dexy's Midnight Runners, The Damned, Madness, Motörhead and Nine Below Zero. Collected here are all the dysfunctional foursome's manic adventures - from discovering oil in the basement, to playing host to the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, to representing Scumbag College on University Challenge. Now you can hear from your favourite characters once again, and listen to their iconic one-liners, inventive insults and fabulously funny quotes. Full of wild slapstick, surreal twists, over-the-top ultra-violence and absurdist humour, this innovative, iconoclastic series remains one of the greatest sitcoms of all time. This audio-only collection of the original TV soundtracks provides the perfect opportunity for fans to relive the show's finest moments while on the go. Contains strong language and humour that some listeners may find offensive. Production credits Written by Ben Elton, Rik Mayall and Lise Mayer With additional material by Alexei Sayle Music: Peter Brewis Sound: Laurie Taylor Directed by Paul Jackson and Graeme Story Rick - Rik Mayall Vyvyan Basterd - Adrian Edmondson Neil Pye - Nigel Planer Mike - Christopher Ryan The Balowski family - Alexei Sayle With Amazulu, Mark Arden, Helen Atkinson Wood, Jim Barclay, Christopher Barrie, Gary Beadle, Perry Benson, Paul Bradley, Arnold Brown, Ruth Burnett, Jean Campbell-Dallas, Jonathan Caplan, Hugh Cecil, Vikki Chambers, Jean Channon, Jacqueline Clarke, Robbie Coltrane, Ron Cook, Lee Cornes, Brian Croucher, The Damned, Mark Dewison, Dexy's Midnight Runners, Paola Dionisotti, Steve Dixon, Nick Dunning, Christine Ellerbeck, Chris Ellis, Ben Elton, Alan Freeman, Dawn French, Stephen Frost, Stephen Fry, Paul Gale, Peter Greene, Roger Ashton Griffiths, Gareth Hale, Damaris Hayman, Tamsin Heatley, Lenny Henry, Clair Hill, Jools Holland, Ceri Jackson, Terry Jones, Gerard Kelly, Steve Kelly, Ken Bishop 's Nice Twelve, Mark Lambert, Hugh Laurie, Peter Laxton, Helen Lederer, Justine Lord, Norman Lovett, Madness, Paul Martin, Hilary Mason, Kilian McKenna, Pauline Melville, Carla Mendonca, Motörhead, Patrick Newell, Nine Below Zero, Herbert Norville, Brian Oulton, John Otway, John Owens, Norman Pace, Robin Parkinson, Ken Parry, Daniel Peacock, Joanne Pearce, Jan Prince, Radical Posture, David Rappaport, Michael Redfern, Griff Rhys Jones, Rip Rig + Panic, Tony Robinson, David Rolfe, Jennifer Saunders, Cyril Shaps, Anthony Sharp, Cindy Shelley, Roger Sloman, Mel Smith, Barry Stanton, Maggie Steed, Kay Stonham, Tony Sympson, Emma Thompson, Andy de la Tour, Peter Wear, Julianne White First broadcast on BBC Two, 9 November-14 December 1982 (Series 1), 8 May-19 June 1984 (Series 2) © 2023 BBC Studios Distribution Ltd (P) 2023 BBC Studios Distribution Ltd"

Ben Elton, Lise Mayer, Rik Mayall (Author), Adrian Edmondson, Alexei Sayle, Ben Elton, Christopher Ryan, Dawn French, Full Cast, Hugh Laurie, Jennifer Saunders, Nigel Planer, Rik Mayall, Stephen Fry (Narrator)

Audiobook

Identity Crisis

"Random House presents the audiobook edition of Identity Crisis, written and read by Ben Elton. Why are we all so hostile? So quick to take offence? Truly we are living in the age of outrage. A series of apparently random murders draws amiable, old-school Detective Mick Matlock into a world of sex, politics, reality TV and a bewildering kaleidoscope of opposing identity groups. Lost in a blizzard of hashtags, his already complex investigation is further impeded by the fact that he simply doesn’t ‘get’ a single thing about anything anymore. Meanwhile, each day another public figure confesses to having ‘misspoken’ and prostrates themselves before the judgement of Twitter. Begging for forgiveness, assuring the public “that is not who I am”. But if nobody is who they are anymore - then who the f**k are we? Ben Elton returns with a blistering satire of the world as it fractures around us. Get ready for a roller-coaster thriller, where nothing - and no one - is off limits."

Ben Elton (Author), Ben Elton (Narrator)

Audiobook

Meltdown

"For amiable City trader Jimmy Corby money was the new Rock n' Roll. His whole life was a party, adrenalin charged and cocaine fuelled. If he hadn't met Monica he would probably have ended up either dead or in rehab. But Jimmy was as lucky in love as he was at betting on dodgy derivatives, so instead of burning out, his star just burned brighter than ever. Rich, pampered and successful, Jimmy, Monica and their friends lived the dream, bringing up their children with an army of domestic helps. But then it all came crashing down. And when the global financial crisis hit, Jimmy discovers that anyone can handle success. It's how you handle failure that really matters."

Ben Elton (Author), Paul Thornley (Narrator)

Audiobook

Time and Time Again

"It’s the 1st of June 1914 and Hugh Stanton, ex-soldier and celebrated adventurer is quite literally the loneliest man on earth. No one he has ever known or loved has been born yet. Perhaps now they never will be. Stanton knows that a great and terrible war is coming. A collective suicidal madness that will destroy European civilization and bring misery to millions in the century to come. He knows this because, for him, that century is already history. Somehow he must change that history. He must prevent the war. A war that will begin with a single bullet. But can a single bullet truly corrupt an entire century? And, if so, could another single bullet save it?"

Ben Elton (Author), Jot Davies (Narrator)

Audiobook

Two Brothers

"Brought to you by Penguin. Bestselling author Ben Elton's most personal novel to date, Two Brothers transports the reader to the time of history's darkest hour. Berlin 1920 Two babies are born. Two brothers. United and indivisible, sharing everything. Twins in all but blood. As Germany marches into its Nazi Armageddon, the ties of family, friendship and love are tested to the very limits of endurance. And the brothers are faced with an unimaginable choice... Which one of them will survive? © Ben Elton 2012 (P) Penguin Audio 2012"

Ben Elton (Author), Jot Davies (Narrator)

Audiobook

Blackadder: The Complete Collected Series

"The complete soundtracks of all four Blackadder series, plus over three hours of specials and extras Through the ages of Britain, from the 15th century to the 21st, Edmund Blackadder has meddled his way along the bloodlines, aided by his two imbecilic sidekicks, Lord Percy and Baldrick, and hindered by an assortment of dimwitted aristocrats. With cunning plans and cutting comedy, listen as the Blackadder dynasty plot their way through history… The Black Adder – Set in the Middle Ages, this iconic first series follows the fictitious reign of King Richard IV, played by Brian Blessed, through the experiences of his unfavoured second son Prince Edmund “The Black Adder” Blackadder II - The Blackadder genes resurface in Elizabethan England for more historical comedy Blackadder the Third - Blackadder turns up as butler to the Prince Regent in the late 18th Century Blackadder Goes Forth – The scheming Blackadder is dropped into the trenches during the First World War Also included in this collection are eight Blackadder TV and radio specials: Blackadder’s Christmas Carol, Blackadder: The Cavalier Years, Blackadder: Woman’s Hour Invasion, The Shakespeare Sketch, Blackadder: Back and Forth, Blackadder: The Army Years, Blackadder: I Have a Cunning Plan and the Blackadder instalment of the TV series Britain's Best Sitcom. Written by film and TV royalty Richard Curtis, Ben Elton and Rowan Atkinson, and starring comedy giants Rowan Atkinson, Tony Robinson, Tim McInnerny, Hugh Laurie, Stephen Fry, Miranda Richardson, and Rik Mayall, this is history at its grittiest and funniest. Track Listing: - Chapters 1-6: The Black Adder - Chapters 7-12: Blackadder II - Chapters 13-18: Blackadder the Third - Chapters 19-24: Blackadder Goes Forth - Chapter 25: Blackadder’s Christmas Carol - Chapter 26: The Cavalier Years - Chapter 27: Woman’s Hour Invasion - Chapter 28: The Shakespeare Sketch - Chapter 29: Back and Forth - Chapter 30: The Army Years (Royal Variety Performance) - Chapter 31: I Have a Cunning Plan - Chapter 32: Britain's Best Sitcom Cast and credits Written by Richard Curtis, Ben Elton and Rowan Atkinson Edmund Blackadder - Rowan Atkinson S. Baldrick - Tony Robinson Melchett - Stephen Fry Lord Percy Percy – Tim McInnerny George – Hugh Laurie Queen Elizabeth I / Various – Miranda Richardson Including standout performances by Rik Mayall, Miriam Margolyes, Patsy Byrne, Brian Blessed, Robbie Coltrane, Jim Broadbent, Gabrielle Glaister, Elspet Gray, Robert East, Helen Atkinson-Wood, Bill Wallis, Stephen Frost, Mark Arden, Lee Cornes, Warren Clarke, Philip Pope, Barbara Miller, David Nunn, Denis Lill, Adrian Edmondson, Nigel Planer, Stephen Frost, Chris Barrie, Jeremy Hardy and Ben Elton. ©2019 BBC Studios Distribution Ltd (P)2019 BBC Studios Distribution Ltd"

Ben Elton, Richard Curtis (Author), Full Cast, Hugh Laurie, Miranda Richardson, Rik Mayall, Rowan Atkinson, Stephen Fry, Tim Mcinnery, Tony Robinson (Narrator)

Audiobook

Blast From The Past

"It's two fifteen a.m., you're in bed alone and you're woken by the phone. Your eyes are wide and your body tense before it has completed so much as a single ring. And as you wake, in the tiny moment between sleep and consciousness, you know already that something is wrong. Only someone bad would call at such an hour. Or someone good, but with bad news, which would probably be worse. You lie there in the darkness and wait for the answer machine to kick in. Your own voice sounds strange as it tells you that nobody is there but that a message can be left. You feel your heart beat. You listen. And then you hear the one voice in the world you least expect . . . your very own Blast From the Past."

Ben Elton (Author), Michael Maloney (Narrator)

Audiobook

Blind Faith

"Brought to you by Penguin. Imagine a world where everyone knows everything about everybody. Where 'sharing' is valued above all, and privacy is considered a dangerous perversion. Trafford wouldn't call himself a rebel, but he's daring to be different, to stand out from the crowd. In his own small ways, he wants to push against the system. But in this world, uniformity is everything. And even tiny defiances won't go unnoticed. Ben Elton's dark, savagely comic novel imagines a post-apocalyptic society where religious intolerance combines with a sex-obsessed, utterly egocentric culture. In this world, nakedness is modesty, independent thought subversive, and ignorance is wisdom. A chilling vision of what's to come? Or something rather closer to home? © Ben Elton 2007 (P) Penguin Audio 2009"

Ben Elton (Author), Glen McCready (Narrator)

Audiobook

Chart Throb

"Brought to you by Penguin. Chart Throb.The ultimate pop quest. Ninety five thousand hopefuls. Three judges. Just one winner. And that's Calvin Simms, the genius behind the show. Calvin always wins because Calvin writes the rules. But this year, as he sits smugly in judgement upon the mingers, clingers and blingers whom he has pre-selected in his carefully scripted 'search' for a star, he has no idea that the rules are changing. The 'real' is about to be put back into 'reality' television and Calvin and his fellow judges (the nation's favourite mum and the other bloke) are about to become ex-factors themselves. Ben Elton, author of Popcorn and Dead Famous returns to blistering comic satire with a savagely hilarious deconstruction of the world of modern television talent shows. Chart Throb. One winner. A whole bunch of losers. © Ben Elton 2006 (P) Penguin Audio 2009"

Ben Elton (Author), Glen Mccready (Narrator)

Audiobook

The Blackadder

"Through the ages, men of flair, faculty and outstanding courage have contributed to their country's heritage. Others, like the snivelling worm Edmund, Duke of Edinburgh (alias 'The Black Adder'), have emerged from the dust of dodgy documents to claim their wrongful place in history... This historic first series introduced us to Rowan Atkinson's first incarnation as Black Adder - the incompetent, bitter and twisted son of Richard, Duke of York, who, with the help of his trusty (and equally stinky) aide, Baldrick (Tony Robinson), and Percy (Tim McInnerny) begins his slithering journey through the ages, scheming for an easier life, a better position and perhaps even a shot at the throne itself. The original series also stars Brian Blessed as Richard IV, Peter Cook as Richard III, Miriam Margolyes as the Infanta Maria of Spain and Rik Mayall as Mad Gerald. Episodes include: 'The Foretelling', 'The Queen of Spain's Beard', 'Born to Be King', 'Witchsmeller Pursuivant', 'Archbishop' and 'The Black Seal'."

Ben Elton, Richard Curtis (Author), Rowan Atkinson, Tony Robinson (Narrator)

Audiobook

Blackadder II

"England 1558-1603. The filthy genes of the Blackadder dynasty bubble to the surface of history's melting pot as Lord Edmund, arrogant peer-about-town, swaggers with a big head and small beard in search of grace and favour from the stark raving mad Queen Bess. Listen as Lord Blackadder falls in love with a girl named Bob, takes over the job of executioner whilst almost losing his own head, schemes to raise £1,000 to pay off a perverted Bishop, goes on a far-off sea voyage to the remote country of France, and plays charades with a member of the Spanish Inquisition. Rowan Atkinson stars as Blackadder in Richard Curtis' and Ben Elton's award-winning comedy in which, ably hampered by Tony Robinson as the loyal Baldrick, he wreaks havoc throughout the centuries. This collection includes the following episodes: 'Bells', 'Head', 'Potato', 'Money', 'Beer' and 'Chains'."

Ben Elton, Richard Curtis (Author), Rowan Atkinson, Tony Robinson (Narrator)

Audiobook