Audiobooks by Adam Mansbach

The Golem of Brooklyn: A Novel Audiobook

The dazzlingly imaginative, ferociously funny story of an art teacher, a bodega clerk, and a five-thousand-year-old clay crisis monster, from the author of the #1 New York Times bestseller Go the F**k to Sleep. "A devastating romp through history, a bonkers road trip through America, this novel could not be any funnier-or any more important."-W. Kamau Bell In Ashkenazi Jewish folklore, a golem is a humanoid being created out of mud or clay and animated through secret prayers. Its sole purpose is to defend the Jewish people against the immediate threat of violence. It is always a rabbi who makes a golem, and always in a time of crisis. But Len Bronstein is no rabbi-he's a Brooklyn art teacher who steals a large quantity of clay from his school, gets extremely stoned, and manages to bring his creation to life despite knowing little about Judaism and even less about golems. Unable to communicate with his nine-foot-six, four hundred-pound, Yiddish-speaking guest, Len enlists a bodega clerk and ex-Hasid named Miri Apfelbaum to translate. Eventually, The Golem learns English by binge-watching Curb Your Enthusiasm after ingesting a massive amount of LSD and reveals that he is a creature with an ancestral memory; he recalls every previous iteration of himself, making The Golem a repository of Jewish history and trauma. He demands to know what crisis has prompted his re-creation and whom must he destroy. When Miri shows him a video of white nationalists marching and chanting "Jews will not replace us," the answer becomes clear. The Golem of Brooklyn is an epic romp through Jewish history and the American present that wrestles with the deepest questions of our humanity-the conflicts between faith and skepticism, tribalism and interdependence, and vengeance and healing.

Adam Mansbach (Author), Danny Hoch (Narrator)

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Just Try One Bite

From the bestselling author of Go the **** to Sleep and healthy eating advocate Camila Alves McConaughey comes a whimsical role reversal in which picky eater parents are confronted by their three kids, with hilarious results These three kids are determined to get their parents to put down the ice cream, cake, and chicken fried steak to just try one bite of healthy whole foods. But it's harder than it looks when these over-the-top gagging, picky parents refuse to give things like broccoli and kale a chance. Kids will love the jaunty rhyme that's begging to be read aloud and the opportunity to be way smarter-and healthier-than their parents.

Adam Mansbach, Camila Alves Mcconaughey (Author), Livingston Alves Mcconaughey, Vida Alves Mcconaughey, Vivien Mansbach (Narrator)

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I Had a Brother Once: A Poem, A Memoir

A brilliant, genre-defying work-both memoir and epic poem-about the struggle for wisdom, grace, and ritual in the face of unspeakable loss "A bruised and brave love letter from a brother right here to a brother now gone . . . a soaring, unblinking gaze into the meaning of life itself."-Marlon James, author of Black Leopard, Red Wolf my father said david has taken his own life Adam is in the middle of his own busy life, and approaching a career high in the form of a #1 New York Times bestselling book-when these words from his father open a chasm beneath his feet. I Had a Brother Once is the story of everything that comes after. In the shadow of David's inexplicable death, Adam is forced to re-remember a brother he thought he knew and to reckon with a ghost, confronting his unsettled family history, his distant relationship with tradition and faith, and his desperate need to understand an event that always slides just out of his grasp. This is an expansive and deeply thoughtful poetic meditation on loss and a raw, darkly funny, human story of trying to create a ritual-of remembrance, mourning, forgiveness, and acceptance-where once there was a life.

Adam Mansbach (Author), Adam Mansbach (Narrator)

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Jake the Fake Keeps His Cool

For fans of Diary of a Wimpy Kid and Big Nate comes the third book in this laugh-out-loud series about a class clown faking his way through middle school from comedian and film star Craig Robinson, #1 New York Times bestselling author Adam Mansbach, and NAACP History Maker recipient and cartoonist Keith Knight. Life couldn't be better for Jake. He's a student at Music and Arts Academy and a budding comedian, and he finally put an end to his fake-ster ways . . . or so he thought. There's a new girl at school, and Jake would do anything to impress her, even pretending to be a master chef. And a world-renowned barber? But at home, Jake is less impressed with his mom's news: she's pregnant. Now Jake has to fake being happy about becoming the Middle Child. The King of Cool is about to drop his chill. Luckily, he has good friends and laughs on his side.

Adam Mansbach, Craig Robinson (Author), Sullivan Jones (Narrator)

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Fuck, Now There Are Two of You

Adam Mansbach famously gave voice to two of parenting's primal struggles in Go the Fuck to Sleep and You Have to Fucking Eat—the often-imitated, never-duplicated pair of New York Times bestsellers that ushered in a new era of radical honesty in humor books for parents. But what could possibly be left? Parents—new, old, expectant, and grand—of multiple children already knew the answer. Author Adam Mansbach discovered it for himself by having two more kids, less than two years apart. Fuck, Now There Are Two of You is a loving monologue about that new addition to the family, addressed to a big sibling and shot through with Adam's trademark profane truth-telling. Chock-full of unspoken sentiments channeled directly from the brains of parents worldwide, Fuck, Now There Are Two of You articulates all the fears and frustrations attendant to the simple, math-defying fact that two is a million more kids than one. As you probably know by now, you shouldn't read it to a child.

Adam Mansbach (Author), Larry David (Narrator)

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Jake the Fake Goes for Laughs

For fans of Diary of a Wimpy Kid and Big Nate comes the second book in the side-splitting series about a class clown faking his way to comedy stardom from comedian and film star Craig Robinson, #1 New York Timesbestselling author Adam Mansbach, and NAACP History Maker recipient and cartoonist Keith Knight. 'An absolute riot!' --LINCOLN PEIRCE, author of the BIG NATE series Jake cracks up the crowd as a budding comedian at the Music and Art Academy talent show, but his new ego is no laughing matter. And when he starts blowing off his friends to pursue his 'art,' Jake's big head becomes a huge bummer. Plus, being the funny man is way tougher than it looks. Luckily, Jake has his mentor Maury Kovalski, a retired comedy showstopper, to teach him the ropes about humor--and humility--before Jake loses all his biggest fans and best friends! Jake the Fake stuns again with even greater gags and giggles than before!

Adam Mansbach, Craig Robinson (Author), Sullivan Jones (Narrator)

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Benjamin Franklin: You've Got Mail

If the Future has any remedy for this situation, do not hesitate to provide it. That is to say, Ike and Claire Wanzandae, HELP! HELP HELP HELP. I am (perhaps not for long),Benjamin Franklin Ike Saturday has seen better days. For one thing, his pen pal, Benjamin Franklin (yes, that Benjamin Franklin), is the target of an angry mob after Ike's plan to help the Founding Fathers with some intel from the future seriously backfired. For another, he's decided to mail himself back in time with the help of his girlfriend, Claire Wanzandae, and it's not a particularly comfortable way to travel. Once Ike tracks B-Freezy down in 1776, it becomes clear that his pal is less than impressed with the irritating, modern-day rescuer, partially because Ike has a habit of making things worse for Ben, and partially because Ben is incredibly cranky when not in the presence of numerous meat pies. Which speaks to another issue for the pair: they have no money, no food, and basically no plan for saving the country. But Claire won't be able to cover for Ike back home in the future forever, and the British are looking pretty impatient, so Ike and B-Freezy will have to come up with something quickly if they want to avoid an epic, history-destroying disaster. In this hilarious sequel to Benjamin Franklin: Huge Pain in My . . . , Adam Mansbach and Alan Zweibel take Ike and B-Freezy's antics to the next level as this ill-paired (and sometimes actually ill) duo hold the future of the world in their not-so-capable hands.

Adam Mansbach, Alan Zweibel (Author), Lauren Ezzo, Nick Podehl, Tom Parks (Narrator)

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For This We Left Egypt?: A Passover Haggadah for Jews and Those Who Love Them

If you’ve ever suffered through a Passover Seder, you’re well aware of the fact that the entire evening can feel like we’re still in bondage. There are endless stories, frequent hand washing, and not enough eating. The book you hold before you is no ordinary Haggadah. For This We Left Egypt? is a hilarious and entertaining parody from the comedic minds of Dave Barry, Alan Zweibel, and Adam Mansbach. These award-winning comedy writers take you through every step of the Seder, from getting rid of all the chametz in your house by setting it on fire with a standard blowtorch (preferably outdoors), to breaking the middle matzah—that is, if you can find a piece that isn’t already broken, to a hilariously absurd retelling of the Passover story featuring Pharaoh Schmuck, a burning bush that sounds kind of like Morgan Freeman, and the Promised Land which turned out not to be a land of milk and honey but rather one of rocks and venomous scorpions the size of Yorkshire terriers. Also included are useless commentary and thought-provoking discussion questions throughout such as: Is Manischewitz considered a plague? Publishing just in time for Passover, this book will be the perfect gift book from G-d that you’ll want to share and laugh over with friends and family.

Adam Mansbach, Alan Zweibel, Dave Barry (Author), Adam Mansbach, Alan Zweibel, Dave Barry (Narrator)

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Jake the Fake Keeps it Real

For fans of Diary of a Wimpy Kid and Big Nate comes a new side-splitting series from comedian and film star Craig Robinson, #1 New York Times bestselling author Adam Mansbach, and NAACP History Maker recipient and cartoonist Keith Knight. Jake can barely play an instrument, not even a kazoo. And his art? It’s better suited for Pictionary than Picasso. Which is a real problem because Jake just faked his way into the Music and Art Academy for the gifted and talented (and Jake is pretty sure he is neither). More jokester than composer, Jake will have to think of something quick before the last laugh is on him. Featuring more than 160 illustrations, Jake the Fake is sure to bring the laughs with his hilarious high jinks!

Adam Mansbach, Craig Robinson (Author), Sullivan Jones (Narrator)

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Benjamin Franklin: Huge Pain in My...

FRANKLIN ISAAC SATURDAY HAS PROBLEMS. His name is Franklin, for one thing. His father's been relocated across the country, for another; and his mother's remarried to Dirk the Jerk. Middle school is proving to be one big weird popularity contest, and Ike doesn't know the rules-but it seems like everyone else sure does. The only bright spot in Ike's life is his beautiful and brilliant lab partner, Claire Wanzandae, his cherry blossom-scented longtime crush. But an extra-credit assignment changes everything. The assignment is simple: write a letter to a Famous Historical Person. Ike picks Benjamin Franklin, the dude he's named after. He even steals an old-timey stamp from Dirk the Jerk's collection for "bonus authenticity." Done. An easy-peasy five points added to his history grade. Then, to make Claire laugh, Ike mails the letterand Ben Franklin writes back! Thus begins a most unlikely friendship. Ben's having problems with the other Founding Fathers similar to those Ike's having at school-maybe they can help each other. Or maybe Ben's wisdom will screw up Ike's life even more, and maybe Ike's advice will destroy the United States before the Declaration of Independence even gets signed. Forget being grounded and getting in with the in crowd-Ike has bigger problems now, like accidentally changing the course of history.

Adam Mansbach, Alan Zweibel (Author), Lauren Ezzo, Nick Podehl, Tom Parks (Narrator)

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The Devil's Bag Man: A Novel

In this chilling sequel to The Dead Run, New York Times bestselling author Adam Mansbach mixes horror, the supernatural and gritty suspense to deliver a high-octane, high-concept adventure filled with nasty bad guys, fearsome magic, and an unlikely hero caught in the dangerous terrain of the Tex-Mex borderland. Locked in a Mexican jail for a crime he didn't commit, Jess Galvan made a devil's bargain to escape and make it back home. Now, he's trapped in his own personal hell, his mind and body inhabited by the soul of Cucuy, a fearsome, five-hundred-year-old Aztec priest and major crime kingpin determined to bring about hell on earth. Estranged from his daughter, Sherry, and now his own body, Galvan's every moment is a battle to keep the evil priest at bay. But there is a silver lining, his presence has endowed Galvan with superhuman strength and endurance. Meanwhile, in the bowels of Ojos Negros prison, Cucuy's second-in-command, Domingo Valentine, is trying to run the empire Cucuy left behind when he vanished, but the drug cartels they once controlled are at war with one another. Desperate for answers, Valentine springs the imprisoned leader of a deadly biker gang and now they're on the hunt for Galvan, who must find a way to exorcise his inner demon and save the world from annihilation.

Adam Mansbach (Author), Erik Bergmann (Narrator)

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You Have to Fucking Eat

From the author of the international bestseller GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP comes a book about the other great parental frustration: getting your little angel to eat something that even vaguely resembles a normal meal. Profane, loving and deeply cathartic, YOU HAVE TO FUCKING EAT breaks the code of child-rearing silence, giving new, old, grand- and expectant parents a much-needed chance to laugh about a universal problem.* *You probably shouldn't read it to your children.

Adam Mansbach (Author), Stephen Fry (Narrator)

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